Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Change

So a friend posted on her blog about how many changes she and her husband had undergone in the year since they had found out they were pregnant.  It got me to thinking about all of the changes in our lives since WE found out we were expecting.  It confounds my mind, actually.  

I had an easy pregnancy.  I didn’t have morning sickness.  I didn’t have excessive saliva or early bleeding.  I had the appropriate aches and pains and I had a bit of trouble sleeping.  My belly got big and my boobs got bigger.  I swear that they were in fact, my third chin as my belly pushed them up so that I could actually put my lipstick on with my cleavage.  (I didn’t try this, I swear).  I might have had a big of gassiness (said in my best southern bell voice)...  and maybe a smidgen of irritability and hormonal outbursts.  I definitely had my cravings (quest for the perfect milkshake anyone?)  Sleep became a thing of the past (little did I know how distant that was going to be).  

Jason liked to tell everyone that he had finally *gotten* it by the time it was THE time...  and how unfair that was all changing on him AGAIN.  We both have a bit of a flair for the dramatic.  He had actually gotten very good at succumbing to my demands...  I got time EVERY single Sunday to soak in the tub with my book (resting on my belly I assure you) and he would even bring me hot chocolate or a hot tea.  And running out for an ice cream sundae from Marble Slab always became an adventure because I ALWAYS would order one thing and then want what he had.  There was one time, in fact, that he put his sundae on the center console and every time he looked away I would take a bite of HIS sundae.  He finally caught me and we both got the giggles.  

When our doctor told us that it was in fact time for Joe to make his appearance, it was painfully obvious to both of us that as much as we were ready... how ready were we?  The nursery was done.  The carseat installed.  The clothes all washed.  The house had been successfully cleaned (I nested and nested and nested and that wasn’t even the computer nesting).  But, these things didn’t come with an instruction manual...  what were we going to do?  

All of a sudden we were thrust into the world of screams, feedings, sleeplessness (I remember Joey and I both crying and Jason telling me that he couldn’t handle both of us crying at the same time), peeing on us, baby spit up and gas.  Then the universe opened and we were also introduced to snuggles, and baby smells, coo’s and smiles.  Then giggles, then belly laughs and syllables and kisses (actually chewing on my chin but same difference).  

So, changes... yes there have been changes. 

Which is good.  We are about to embark on a new adventure...  and not many know about it.  When the time is right, I will announce it but I assure you that change is upon us and it means new and exciting things for us.  I am both scared and elated, apprehensive and excited, intimidated and empowered.  Through it all, I have to believe that this is what is right for us and we will do the best with what we have.  :)  
   

Wednesday, April 2, 2008

Dear Lord... please oh please




make my son who is perfect in every other way...  transform into the same perfect child but also one who sleeps.  I hope I am not asking for much and I really really do appreciate the fact that I have this wonderful little being.  


He makes me smile and laugh at a moments notice.  


He can reduce me to tears with the bat of his long little eyelashes.  


He can invoke the silly side which can be anything from me singing gymboree songs to me dancing around naked in the bathroom trying to keep his attention from the ever elusive kitty litter in the corner.  (sidebar... can you please keep him from actually attaining his goal and climbing into the kitty’s ‘sandbox’?)


He brings out a tenderness that any other mother understands but that non parents just can’t possibly know.  They can’t possibly know...  I didn’t know.  I thought I knew... but man was I wrong.  


I am guessing that he will make me mad more than once in his lifetime...  usually it will probably revolve around his safety and his disregard for it...  but luckily this hasn’t happened yet.  :)  


And... he has the ability to bring forth real frustration... usually centered around his lack of communication.  I understand that once he starts talking.. I won’t ever be able to get back to the quiet that I get now...  but this guessing game is really frustrating.  Mostly at 2:00 in the morning when I am trying to get him to sleep for the second straight hour. Which brings me to the crux of this prayer....  


Lord, can you please (pretty pretty please with a sleep sheep on top?) make him sleep?  Just give him the ability to lay down his sweet little head, close his little eyes and sleep.  I love it.  I miss it!  I daydream about it.  I know he will too, one day.  I may not even be able to keep him up, if he takes after his father.  


I am not even asking for straight to sleep... if he cries or fusses or needs to be rocked, that’s okay...  just help him STAY asleep.  This mommy is about to lose her ever lovin mind.  She is losing it.  Seriously.  She is seeing things where they aren’t... she is having a hard time finishing her sentences and she still has to function.  


Oh yeah... and Dear Lord, can you please keep me from sticking hot forks in my husbands eyes?  I only really feel this way when he is sleeping THROUGH the two and a half straight hours of me fighting with my son to get him back to sleep.  


thank you for listening...  

Your faithful (albeit sleep deprived) servant.  


ps.... if you wanted to enlighten my husband on WHY it’s a bad idea to brag about how *easy* it was for HIM to get the baby to sleep the night before is a bad idea... I won’t stop you!